Friday, September 19, 2014

Silly Christian, crying is for unbelievers! (Part1)

I've had enough.  I am totally and inexplicably fed up.  For eight years now, I have been wandering in this swamp called "defeat".  At times, I stepped out of the muck, and even made some ground walking away from it, but always returned whenever the obstacle proved to discourage me more than my desire to leave encouraged me.

Can I be transparent and admit to something?  After awhile, the muck even started to feel soothing.  It became soothing to waltz slowly through the junk that weighed down my life.  It became typical to shut down, and almost zombie-like, return to the place of self-pity, self-loathing, and self-everything.  Obstacle coming further on up the road?  No problem, I'll just go ahead and head back now.

That is, until the most recent string of obstacles hit.  At first, a few arrows split the air and pierced me in a few different places.  I was already heading over to my place of wallowing despair when the last one hit.  The initial shock and sting of the situation, as usual, brought confusion and the typical "where are You, God?" questions.  But as the tears started to blur my vision, and the songs of "why me" began to play, it was as if God Himself stood up and cried "ENOUGH!".  It was as if He stretched out His hand and froze time, and while I sat there crying, (and now frozen), He grabbed me out of the muck, set my feet on solid ground, and wiped my tears away.  And when I blinked, I was standing, and the most beautiful song of praise filled the air.

There are only so many times you can resort to tears.  Don't get me wrong, tears can be wonderful.  They can show the overwhelming emotion of happiness when the love of your life proposes, or when you hold your child for the first time.  They can flow from the natural pain of losing someone you love, and they can also pour from a heart that's deep in worship, overflowing in awe of God.  In the right moments, tears can be very cathartic.  Ecclesiastes tells us there is a time for everything, and it includes weeping and mourning.  However, God did not create us to be ruled by our emotions.

In Joshua 7, the Israelites suffer a small setback at the hands of their enemies.  Joshua tears his clothes, and falls on his face before God, staying there until the evening.  He cries to God, and starts his own string of "why" questions (that sound hauntingly familiar).  "Why, God, did you bring us this far to leave us?  Why couldn't we just stay back on the other side, why did we ever believe that we could have more?  We're ruined now, no good can come from this.  How could You possibly turn this into good for Your glory?"

The thing I find probably the most interesting, is that it seems like Joshua is doing a very holy thing here.  He's on his face before the ark of the Lord, crying to God.  That's what we're supposed to do, right?  God's not having any of it, though, because then He says, "STAND UP!  What are you doing down on your face?"  Seems kind of cold, right?  I think it's just the opposite.

When I read God's response, I get the feeling that He's thinking "What are you talking about?  Who told you the fight was over?  Who told you the battle was lost?  GET UP and take care of what needs to be done!"  God desires for us to win the battle.  He's not into wasting time moping and being downcast.  He knows what a field day the enemy has when we're on our face wallowing in despair.  Sure, there are times to lay face down, humbly before God.  Those are the times when we are overwhelmed by awareness of the goodness and power of God, humbled by His grace.  But during those moments when we are so consumed by our situation, we need to be looking up in order to see where our help comes from, instead of burying our face in the sand. 

I wonder if Joshua felt a little foolish.  Here he was making a big spectacle over it that even the elders got involved, ripped their clothes, and covered themselves in ashes.

I feel like as Christians we've learned to make a big ceremony over setbacks.  In a weird way, it seems as though some Christians parade around, wearing their "trials and tribulations" like badges, and the more you have, the more faithful a servant you are.  This may sound a little cold hearted, but when the Bible talks about "trials and tribulations", flat tires and speeding tickets just aren't the first things that come to mind.  It's become a joke to talk about "first world problems", but the reason why people laugh is because it's a sad, sad truth.  I guarantee you we all have been to that place where we find ourselves falling on our face before God because our week was just full of these "attacks by the enemy".  Alarm clock didn't go off, late for work, no parking spaces up front, spilled coffee on your favorite blouse, car was towed because you parked in a no parking zone, got a flat tire on the way home, burnt dinner, bounced a check...are these things REALLY testing our faith?  The "arrows" we're suffering daily don't really have to puncture very deep to get us to flinch, do they?  Meanwhile, there are Christians in other parts of the world being jailed and executed for believing in Jesus.  There are Christians in hiding, starving and fighting for their lives and religious freedom. 

I'm not saying that our problems are nonexistent or that we shouldn't cry out to God over them.  I've had plenty of situations that have dropped me to my knees.  Our battles are our battles, and when you're trying to figure out how you're going to pay the bills sometimes it feels like the world is just crashing down around you.  There are so many people with broken hearts, people weighed down by depression, and people who are sick and hurting.  We each have legitimate scars and suffering and I am no one to minimize that.

 What I'm saying is that when we drop to our knees in prayer, we should be quick to acknowledge God's omnipotence and authority over even these little earthly things, and not allow the enemy to paralyze us in despair.

One of the most emotionally painful things a woman can go through is barrenness.  I love to read about Hannah.  She was beyond broken in spirit, she was crushed.  She fell before The Lord in prayer, sobbing and pouring her heart out to God.  After Eli blessed her, though, she got up, dried her eyes, and moved on.  The Bible says her "face was no longer downcast." (1 Samuel 1:18).

 If we truly saw our situations in light of God's glory, in light of ETERNITY, I think we'd be quicker to truly believe Him when He says "for I know the plans I have for you...not to harm you, but to give you hope and a future." (Jeremiah 29:11).  How many of us know that verse, quote it, yet don't rest in the truth of it?

If we truly saw our situations in light of God's glory, I think we'd be like Hannah, quick to cast off the robes of mourning and move on with our day, confident that God had heard our cry.   We'd be quicker to recognize our situations for what they are - temporary setbacks that have nothing against the One who holds all things in His hands.  After all, are we not worth so much more to Him than the birds and flowers of the field? (Matt. 6:28)

Read Part 2

 



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